Isami Jae

I am very sorry

Tue, 13 May 2008 11:39:12 GMT

... but I am in a serious situation right now.

I can't share with you the details. This would only matter to you if you read my fics. So if you DON'T read my fics, any of it, or if you have malicious intentions towards me, please leave. I don't need more paranoia than what I already have. I don't need people ruining my life.

I'll get down to the point. Soon, isamijae will stop running. Permanently. I can't keep posting things here, for reasons I cannot disclose.

But since I still have unfinished business (read: fics ^^), I am NOT going to stop writing. No shit is going to stop me from that. Since posting stuff here is no longer possible, I have no choice but to create another writing journal. I am sorry that I cannot tell you what my new handle is yet. But once I do create a new LJ, rest assured that I will PM those who regularly comments on my fics and those who I know quite well. For the rest of you, if you know what fics I write, you'd have no trouble figuring it out. Besides, if it's my fics that you care more about, the fics won't change. Just the username of the person who posts them. (Sometimes I read fics without even looking at the author's name. I am very bad! =O)

edit: However, you wish for me to inform you of my new LJ handle later, just leave a comment saying so. If you wish for me to add/friend you straightaway, let me know as well. It'd help me more if you specify which one of my fics that you like/follow.

For now, I'm f-locking all my old entries on this journal one by one. I'll start with the NC-17 ones before locking the others. Once I've created a new journal, I'll move everything there. On the new journal, I'll only keep the fics public for the first two or three days before f-locking it. I hate doing this, but I have no other choice. I cannot afford having my fics public anymore. I know this new policy might lose me a bunch of readers, but the alternative is much uglier. It's either I do this or I don't post my fics at all.

Perhaps I'll keep this journal for non-fictional stuff. I want to make the other journal Fics-Only. I know this might not be the best thing to do, but I cannot do anything else. I am already very troubled. I don't want to lose what I've built up for one whole year. I am very sorry. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me for taking this step.

I am very sorry. I am also very sorry that I cannot offer you any explanations. You can ask me personally if you want. Comments are screened for this reason.

Have a nice day and thank you for reading. *bows*

[Fic] Godsend (11/?)

Sun, 11 May 2008 06:25:06 GMT

Title: Godsend
Length: Series, (11/?)
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: JaeHo/YunJae, YooSu
Genre: Sci-fi, Adventure, Drama
Summary: Set in Vacation 1 Universe. A year after their ‘vacation’, Yoochun gets catapulted to the future and witnesses something horrible. Now, back in the present, he needs to prevent the future he has seen from happening.
Requirements: Must Watch Vacation 1 First.

Season 1

Season 2

11.0 Next Wave

Note: Please go here and ask to be added in order to read.

Disclaimer: This fic, although based on real people, is a pure work of fiction and does not reflect true occurrances, views and orientations. No financial profit has been made in the production of this fic. "Heroes" is created by Tim Kring.

[Fic] Kill-a Morning

Fri, 02 May 2008 18:48:32 GMT

Title: Kill-a Morning
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Length: Oneshot
Rating: R/NC-17
Genre: Smut/Lemon
Setting: Jung Yunho M.D. Universe.
Requirements: It'd be better if you've read the previous installments of this Universe. Not compulsory, though.
Summary: What happened on Jaejoong's end of the line after the phone call to his brother.

+ + Kill-a Morning + +

Due to rating, please add my writing LJ here to read.

[Fic] Just Because

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:22:41 GMT

Title: Just Because
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Length: Oneshot
Rating: G
Genre: General
Setting: Jung Yunho M.D. Universe. Takes place after Only At Night
Requirements: It'd be better if you've read the previous installments of this Universe. Not compulsory, though.
Summary: Changshik contemplates how his life defies all Laws of Contemporary Logic. (Changshik-centric.)

What is the best way to start a pointless drabble?

If you can't access that, you need to visit this post and ask to be added in order to read. Thank you ^^

[Fic] Godsend (10/?) Pt. III

Sat, 12 Apr 2008 16:33:11 GMT

Title: Godsend
Length: Series, (10/?) Pt. 3/3
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: JaeHo/YunJae, YooSu
Genre: Sci-fi, Adventure, Drama
Summary: Set in Vacation 1 Universe. A year after their ‘vacation’, Yoochun gets catapulted to the future and witnesses something horrible. Now, back in the present, he needs to prevent the future he has seen from happening.
Requirements: Must Watch Vacation 1 First.

Season 1<

Season 2

10.0 Just You and I - Part 3

Please add my writing LJ here to read.

Disclaimer: This fic, although based on real people, is a pure work of fiction and does not reflect true occurrances, views and orientations. No financial profit has been made in the production of this fic. "Heroes" is created by Tim Kring.

[Fic] Hypothetical

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 20:17:05 GMT

This is my entry for the Good Friday Writing Contest. I really had fun writing this! I didn't expect to even get shortlisted >____>;; I was really surprised. I just woke up after a looooong nap, drowsily checked my e-mail and was confused as to why suddenly people were giving me messages. xD Thank you to razra_eizel, susgirl, and tkder for your lovely messages. <3

This is my first time joining any writing contests such as this. However, I CANNOT TAKE THE FULL CREDIT! This fic was betaed by the lovely, wonderful, amazing, great, all-talented orionsroad. Congrats on your win also, Loki! <3 See? I told you I need you. Who am I without thee??

And while I'm on a roll, I'd like to thank machaparfait too for putting up with me when I spazz in anxiety over this contest. I was all "OMG THE RESULTS ARE COMING OUT TOMORROW!" a day before the results. ^^

Um, sorry about the spazzing. I am still in disbelief. O_o I've been wanting to post this since forever, but I had to wait for the results to be announced before doing so. So now the moment is finally here ^^. I hope you've been looking forward to this as much as I have. I really like this. And Loki's beta has made it 500x better. I hope you'll like this too.

+ + HYPOTHETICAL + +

Due to content, please add my writing LJ here and leave a comment to be added in order to read. Thank you. ^^

[Fic] Only At Night

Wed, 02 Apr 2008 16:23:17 GMT

Title: Only At Night
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Length: Oneshot
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Yunjae
Genre: Fluff, minor Angst
Setting: Jung Yunho M.D. Universe
Requirements: It'd be better if you've read the previous installments of this Universe. Not compulsory, though.

Isami's Rants: This is just a random oneshot from this Universe, no medical stuff this time around, so this isn't a full episode. I am not supposed to write/post this now, but I miss writing so much, and I am needing some fluff so ... I hope you enjoy this. This is unbetaed and done on a school night, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. =^^=

Only At Night

Please add my writing journal here to read. Thank you. ^^

[Fic] Godsend (10/?) Pt. II

Mon, 17 Mar 2008 15:47:12 GMT

Title: Godsend
Length: Series, (10/?) Pt. 2/3
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: JaeHo/YunJae, YooSu
Genre: Sci-fi, Adventure, Drama
Summary: Set in Vacation 1 Universe. A year after their ‘vacation’, Yoochun gets catapulted to the future and witnesses something horrible. Now, back in the present, he needs to prevent the future he has seen from happening.
Requirements: Must Watch Vacation 1 First.

Season 1<

Season 2

10.0 Just You and I - Part 2

Please add my writing LJ here to read.

Disclaimer: This fic, although based on real people, is a pure work of fiction and does not reflect true occurrances, views and orientations. No financial profit has been made in the production of this fic. "Heroes" is created by Tim Kring.

Up & Down

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 15:10:07 GMT

How do you stop looking?

How do you pretend that everything is fine? That the notion of inferiority does not bother you? Does not gnaw on the bottom of your stomach every single day?

You’ve done your best. You’ve sung your heart out. You’ve stayed up, day and night. You practically seclude yourself, along with your band mates inside that studio, pumping songs dutifully, like your heart that nourishes your body with blood.

But now your body is spent. Weak. Drained after the long hours of strain. How long will it take? How long will it be before you can stop somewhere and tell yourself “This is enough”? Everyone pushes and pushes you; you have no choice but to follow through.

When? You rap the railing, as if the answer is somewhere carved into the wood. Sighing, you gaze at the sky, feeling smaller than you were. Then you sense someone joining you on the balcony. Neither of you say anything; you like that just fine. After a minute of comfortable silence, he moves behind you and wrap his arms around your waist. You do not protest, nor do you push him away. You welcome him closer instead.

Then he rests his chin on your shoulder and breathes with you.

He lends you his warmth, confidence and strength. You lean on him, with his hands clutching you in possession. You surrender yourself to him, to the stale night and to destiny.

Yes, you have a destiny. Somewhere within you and somewhere out there. You might not know what it is yet, and that the road that has been drawn out for you isn’t that predictable. You’ll get pricked by thorns on the way. And often, there won’t be anyone to pull you up or to pluck those thorns from your skin. You have to stand for yourself, with millions watching but not doing anything.

He kisses your cheek, startling you. Quickly turning your head, you stare at him with wide, bemused eyes. He smiles at you instead, rubbing your foreheads together like a pair of lovers.

Lovers. Love. Where does Love fit in to your Destiny? What role does he play?

Hugging you tighter, he buries his nose in the crook of your jaw and neck. He presses soft kisses on your skin and it melts you. You close your eyes and forget about the charts, the musical scores and the critics. You wallow in his presence and you cannot ask for more than that.

You have him; he has you. What is there left to wish for?

[Fic] Boys By Blood (Pt.3)

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 17:55:15 GMT

Title: Boys By Blood
Length: Three-shot (3/3)
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: PG
Pairings: Yunjae
Genre: Medical Drama
Setting: Set in the "Jung Yunho M.D." Universe
Guest Star: Kim Changshik
Summary: When Jaejoong's long lost brother becomes his latest patient, Yunho finds himself stuck in family tension and a dilemma. What will Yunho do when Jaejoong starts getting emotional, making it difficult for him to do his job?

Part 1 | Part 2

We sort of figured out ourselves...

If you can't access the link, please go here and ask to be added.

[Fic] Boys By Blood (Pt.2)

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 17:37:13 GMT

Title: Boys By Blood
Length: Three-shot (2/3)
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: PG
Pairings: Yunjae
Genre: Medical Drama
Setting: Set in the "Jung Yunho M.D." Universe
Guest Star: Kim Changshik
Summary: When Jaejoong's long lost brother becomes his latest patient, Yunho finds himself stuck in family tension and a dilemma. What will Yunho do when Jaejoong starts getting emotional, making it difficult for him to do his job?

Part 1

Does that make me a bad person?

Please visit this post and ask to be added to have access to this. Thank you. ^^

For some technicalities and brief medical info, please visit Dr. Jung Yunho M.D.: The Tecknicalities

[Extra] Dr. Jung Yunho M.D. : The Tecknicalities

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:41:37 GMT

by Isami J. Mayhard

Hello!! ^-^ Since I have decided to continue this universe, I am creating this post to dump all the technical stuff concerning this universe. It serves the same purpose as Godsend's Geek List, but not exactly similar. (The Geek List is like some lame text book or notes from a boring lecture). This is where I write stuff that I understand about the medical field.

I plan to make this post more interactive i.e. Anyone who has more experience or expertise is always welcomed to add/correct something on the post. Just leave a comment and I'll edit it accordingly. Everything in this post is written by me unless otherwise stated. I sometimes make reference to the show "House" too.

I'll continue to add stuff to this post as this universe progresses. It is not compulsory to read this every time. It is completely up to you to read this or not.

I am sorry that this post is all text. I utterly fail at choosing, uploading and putting up pictures/images. I cringe at the thought of looking for any pics where the DBSK boys even look remotely like doctors. =O If you have any good pics, please do not hesitate to share!

CHARACTERS

In this universe, almost everyone has a certain title or specialty. Here is what we already know:

Dr. Jung Yunho
Physician
Head of Diagnostics Department

Yunho is a doctor who diagnoses diseases, meaning he’s the one who tells you what disease you have, based on your symptoms (the signs that you show). In the story, I call him a “physician” because I am not sure if “diagnostician” is even a proper word. xD That’s what people like him are called in the real world anyway. Yunho runs the diagnostics department and has his own cohort of lackeys working for him, namely Yoochun, Junsu and Changmin. He has access to most of the hospital’s resources, including the MRI, labs and special rooms. When there are no cases, he works at the hospital clinic.

Dr. Kim Jaejoong
Oncologist
Head of Oncology Department

Jaejoong is an oncologist. He specialises in any cancer-related diseases, covering the diagnoses all the way to the treatment. He is the Head of the Oncology Department. He specialises in giving treatments such as chemotherapy and radiation. He is not part of Yunho’s team. Instead, he runs a separate department. By right, Jaejoong and Yunho rarely share cases, since most of Jaejoong’s cases are post-diagnosis, meaning Jaejoong only take on the cases when it is CERTAIN that the patient has cancer. Yunho, on the other hand, work on cases where the conditions are still uncertain.

Dr. Park Yoochun
Neurologist
Diagnostics Department

As a neurologist, Yoochun’s favourite internal organ is the brain. He is an expert when it comes to using the MRI or identifying scans. He can conduct brain surgery and any other procedure that involves cutting people’s heads open. O_o He is also, believe it or not, a multi-talented brainiac ... who likes to eat out of other people's refrigerator and (to Changmin's annoyance) not share.

Dr. Kim Junsu
Immunologist
Diagnostics Department

Junsu is an immunologist, an expert on the physiology of the human body. He knows how the immune system works and how the body reacts to foreign substances. Junsu takes his career too seriously sometimes. Often, he even gets sceptical of Yunho’s diagnoses. Not because he doesn’t trust Yunho, but because Junsu has known Yunho for the longest time amongst all of them, and he knows better than to follow someone blindly. But he is a very good colleague and friend. Because he is a perfectionist, he likes to double-check things and be extra meticulous in everything he does.

Dr. Shim Changmin
Pathologist
Diagnostics Department

After days of intense deliberation, I’ve finally figured out Changmin’s specialty. He is a pathologist, responsible in giving diagnoses based on cells and special stains. Basically, Changmin spends most of his time in the labs, but if needed, he would go out of the confinement of the lab and see the patient. Sometimes he’d get to do biopsies and take cell samples … only if Yunho doesn’t beat him to them first. Even though he is two years younger than the rest of his team members, he fits perfectly in, thanks to his expertise and accuracy when it comes to conducting tests.

DISEASES/CONDITIONS

Immune thrombocytopenic purpura (ITP) is a condition where a person's own antibodies attack his/her own platelets, resulting in low platelet count. Platelet is essential in blood clotting. Therefore, patients with this condition can suffer from prolonged bleeding and develop bruises easier. They can even suffer from nosebleeds and bleeding gums.

Most cases of ITP are a asymptomatic, where the patient does not experience any noticeable symptoms. Asymptomatic diseases may not be discovered until the patient undergoes medical tests.

Haemolytic Anaemia (also Hemolytic Anemia) is anaemia due to haemolysis, the abnormal breakdown of red blood cells. When the rate of RBC breakdown is increased, the body initially compensates by producing more RBCs. However, breakdown of RBCs can exceed the rate that the body can make RBCs. This causes the patient to have less RBCSs and that leads to anaemia.

When haemoglobin in the RBCs break down, they become a product called bilirubin. If bilirubin accumulates in the blood, the person might appear yellow (jaundiced). Bilirubin is excreted in the urine, causing the urine to become a dark brown colour. However, if this condition persists, it can cause liver failure.

Jaundice is not a disease. Instead, it is a sign that can occur in many different diseases. Jaundice is the yellowish staining of the skin and sclerae (the whites of the eyes) that is caused by high levels of bilirubin in the blood. The color of the skin and sclerae vary depending on the level of bilirubin. When the bilirubin level is mildly elevated, they are yellowish. When the bilirubin level is high, they tend to be brown.

EQUIPMENT/MACHINES/TOOLS

Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI)

Basically just a gigantic machine that doctors use to visualise the structure and function of the patient’s body. It can provide images of the body in any plane. The MRI scanner works by detecting the radio signals emitted by the hydrogen atoms in the body when the body reacts to a powerful magnetic field.

[Note: There was this one episode in House: The patient is a prisoner (or something). He has tattoos that were made with ink that contains traces of metal. Metals get attracted to magnets, right? So when the patient underwent the MRI, his tattoos were like … clawing their way out of his skin. O_o]

I’ve learnt that during an MRI, the patient must stay completely still. If he/she moves, the images will be messed up and the whole process must be repeated. That’s why children who can’t help fidgeting (it can get pretty scary and claustrophobic in there) must be injected with sedative so that they fall asleep.

Computed Tomography (CT)

Also a type of medical imaging method that uses X-ray or any ionizing rays. I can’t elaborate more, because I have little experience with this. House rarely shows this machine anyway. For some reason, the MRI is more popular. I think it’s because the MRI is more versatile and accurate?

Crash Cart

[Copied and pasted from wikipedia because the explanation is better than anything I can come up with]

A crash cart or code cart (crash trolley in UK medical jargon) is a set of trays on a wheeled cart that is used in hospital wards and emergency rooms. It contains all the basic equipment necessary to follow ACLS/ALS protocols and potentially save someone's life.

A crash cart typically contains a defibrillator and intravenous medications (such as epinephrine and atropine), plus a variety of medical supplies such as latex gloves and alcohol swabs.

Hospitals typically have internal intercom codes used for situations when someone has suffered a cardiac arrest or a similar potentially fatal condition outside of the emergency room (where such conditions already happen frequently and do not require special announcements). When such codes are given, hospital staff and volunteers are expected to clear the corridors, and to direct visitors to stand aside as the crash cart and a team of physicians and nurses may come through at any moment (see Code Blue).

PROCEDURES/TESTS

Biopsy

A medical test that involves removing cells/tissues for examination. A pathologist generally examines these samples of tissues under a microscope. Chemical tests can also be conducted on the samples.

EPISODES

The stuff I've written for this universe so far:

Teaser: Sugar Drop
Pilot Episode: Boys By Blood [Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]
Side Oneshot: Only At Night
Side Oneshot (Contest Entry): Hypothetical [NC-17!!]
Side Oneshot: Just Because
Side Oneshot (Sequel to Just Because): Kill-a Morning [R/NC-17]

=This post will be continuously edited to change an entry or add any new information=

Credit: House, Wikipedia, Medicinenet.com, my mom -- for making my brain spin -- and the awesome readers of this Universe, for your motivation and support.

Disclaimer: Again, I repeat, I am not a medical student, a doctor or anyone in that field. I do not own anything. This universe is created for entertainment purposes only. I try to be as accurate as possible, but I can't guarantee that everything I write is actually true. x_x

[Fic] Boys By Blood

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 10:18:49 GMT

Title: Boys By Blood
Length: ~~Two-shot (I think ...)~~ Three-shot (1/3)
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: PG
Pairings: Yunjae
Genre: Medical Drama
Setting: Set in the "Jung Yunho M.D." Universe, the same one as Sugar Drop
Guest Star: Kim Changshik ♥
Summary: When Jaejoong's long lost brother becomes his latest patient, Yunho finds himself stuck in family tension and a dilemma. What will Yunho do when Jaejoong starts getting emotional, making it difficult for him to do his job?

A/N: Hello! We meet again! So I've decided to write another episode, because I find myself liking this universe. The guest star today is Kim Changshik because I think it is easier to start with a character I ~~am obsessed with~~ really like. I also remember that my friend has once suggested that I write an AU where Changshik and Jaejoong are identical twins. So that's what they are in this Universe.

edited: Thank you to orionsroad (OMG!!) for offering to beta this. She's awesome!! ^-^

Dedicated to orionsroad because she made me a hilarious manip the first time around and made me laugh like crazy and feel 9999 times better. I love you <3

=Boys By Blood= Pt. I

As soon as the judge rose to his feet, everyone in the courtroom stood too. The members of the jury glanced at each other and sighed in relief; finally the long days of hearings and isolation were over. Once the judge had retired to his chamber, reporters and court officials gathered their stuff and headed towards the exit. The only people who stayed behind, taking their time, were the two sides that had been engaging in an intense battle for two weeks. Now that the victor had been named, of course there was some dissatisfaction.

A skinny, middle-aged man in an inexpensive suit emitted a joyful squeal as he jumped up to his feet and tightly grasped the hands of the man beside him. “We’ve won, Mr. Kim! I'm free now! I’m free now! Thank you thank you thank you!”

The defense attorney scowled slightly, but shook his client’s hand in a professional manner. “You’re welcome. Now you can go home to your family. If you ever get wrongly accused again, you have my number.”

The client nodded enthusiastically. After thanking the lawyer and his assistant for the umpteenth time, he dashed towards the large mahogany doors. Before the door closed, a cheerful scream was heard and the whole world knew that an innocent man had been reunited with his wife and children.

“Wow, finally,” exclaimed the assistant, grinning at his mentor. “You were awesome, Changshik-shi. This case would have gone on forever if anyone else were to handle this.”

“Evidence was scarce,” Changshik muttered, sitting back down to collect his documents. “I could have won sooner if some idiotic policeman had not tampered with the crime scene.”

One of the district attorneys swaggered over to the defense side. With an ugly sneer, he held out a hand to the winner. “Congratulations, Mr. Kim. You’ve won again. My colleagues have warned me that you’re good at playing with words. Too bad I took their advice lightly.”

“And whose fault is that?” Changshik said, not even looking up as he shoved a pile of papers at his protégé.

“Despite your excellence in the courtroom, I think you need some help with your manners,” remarked the prosecutor. “Not all judges will tolerate your rudeness as well as Mr. Lee did.”

Changshik stood up and glared at his opponent. “Who are you to tell me how to do things?” he snapped with cold fire. “Do I go to your room, tell you how to fuck your wife? Mind your own business, mister, and you might win occasionally. But never against me.”

The man’s face went red in anger. With a fierce scoff, he stormed out the door, leaving his partner to carry all his things for him.

“Who the fuck was that?” Changshik demanded of no one in particular, but Ryeowook, his assistant, took it upon himself to answer.

“That’s Mr. Shin, the prosecutor. We’ve been fighting him for the last two weeks. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten his name …”

“Must have slipped my mind after the verdict.” Changshik shrugged. He bent down to fetch his bag but suddenly a sharp pain stabbed his forehead. He quickly clutched his head and grabbed onto the edge of the table for balance.

“Changshik-shi, are you okay?” Ryeowook asked worriedly. “You’ve been looking so pale lately. I think you deserve some rest.”

“I’m fine.” Changshik heard blood rushing into his head in violent waves. He blinked and shook his head, but the dizziness did not abate. Maybe he was just hungry. Yeah, maybe all he needed was some good food to rejuvenate his system. He glanced at his watch. It was already 2 o’clock. He must be waiting for him …

“Let’s go grab something to eat,” suggested Ryeowook once he finished packing. He skipped towards the exit, but stopped when he realised that Changshik had not moved from his spot. “Changshik-shi, are you sure you’re okay?”

Changshik forced himself to stand up straight. Once he did so, the ground wobbled a bit and he had to lean against the table to stay upright. “Yes, I’m sure.” He quickly grabbed his suitcase and headed for the exit too. “I promised to meet someone for lunch. Meet me at the office at 4.”

“Oh?” Ryeowook was more intrigued than worried now. “Your girlfriend?”

Changshik grimaced. “I thought I’d told you to mind your own—“

As sudden a lightning, Changshik’s throat constricted and he felt a brutal lurch in his stomach. He dropped his suitcase and instinctively bent over. He managed to slam a hand over his mouth before something liquid shot out of his throat. He glanced at his hand and saw red.

He stared at his own bloody palm blankly before his whole body went limp and he collapsed to the sound of Ryeowook’s scream.

~*~*~

Dr. Jung Yunho slowly munched on his sandwich, eyes observing the other patrons and staff of the hospital cafeteria. The lady behind the fried rice counter was rubbing her nose. When she dropped her hand, her nose and eyes were red. She was also sniffling. At the sight, there was no way Yunho would eating any fried rice at the cafeteria in the next few weeks.

Yunho was immediately glad that even though Jaejoong could not have lunch with him that day, the oncologist had packed him sandwiches: the best damn sandwiches in the world.

His routine was disrupted by a meek voice.

“Can I have some?”

Yunho glanced at the source of the voice, which was actually a little girl in a wheelchair. She was clutching a pink elephant plushie, eyeing the sandwich in Yunho’s hand hungrily. It did not seem like she had a companion with her, even though it was obvious that she was a patient at the hospital.

“That depends,” replied Yunho. “What do you have?”

“Loo … leu … leukaemia?” the girl stuttered uncertainly.

Yunho pursed his lips pensively. “It’s not contagious.” He handed the girl half of a sandwich. “Here. Someone very important to me made this.”

With a huge smile, the girl accepted the offer and took a bite cheerfully. They ate silently together, Yunho finishing what was left of Jaejoong’s sandwiches with relish. The girl had just swallowed the last bit when someone softly placed a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at the newcomer and let out a happy yell. “Jaejoong oppa!”

Dr. Kim Jaejoong smiled warmly, stroking the girl’s hair. “Susan, what are you doing here? Dr. Kibum has been looking all over for you.”

“Ah, I just wanted to take a stroll.” She pointed at Yunho with a wide grin. “Look, oppa. I've made a new friend!”

“That’s really nice, Susan-ah.”

“You should have told me first,” said Dr. Kim Kibum, appearing from behind Jaejoong. “Sorry, hyung. I took my eyes off her for only a minute.”

Jaejoong shook his head. “It’s all right, Kibum. Susan-ah, be a good girl and let Dr. Kibum bring you back to your ward, okay?”

Susan nodded obediently. Once she and Kibum left, Jaejoong dropped himself onto the chair opposite Yunho and sighed dejectedly. “He didn’t show up,” the oncologist reported sadly.

Yunho offered Jaejoong his coffee. “What did you expect? Him to prance over to you with a giant bouquet of flowers and a daisy in his hair?"

“No!” Jaejoong cried out. The outburst caused other people to peer curiously at him, but once they saw his white coat, they looked away. “He has never stood me up before. I’ve tried calling, but couldn’t get through. I’m very worried.”

“Why? Is he sick?”

Jaejoong nodded somberly. “I think so. My friend said he visited her clinic last week. He went through a normal check-up, grabbed his meds and just left! Without a proper diagnosis! Yunho-yah,” Jaejoong said with a pout, ”maybe you should go see him.”

Yunho resisted the urge to laugh at the idea. “Jaejoong-ah. Even if he were sick, I’m sure it’s not that serious.”

“But … but you know how proud he is!” Jaejoong protested. “He never takes leave and he's always working 24/7! I bet he doesn’t tell anyone if he gets sick. That’s why I've got to check on him often! He must be sick. Or gotten in an accident. Oh no!” He took out his mobile phone and immediately started dialing a number.

At the same time, Yunho’s pager buzzed, alerting him to an incoming message. “I have to go,” he said, pocketing his pager again and standing up.

“Aah, wait for me!” Jaejoong jogged over to Yunho and they briskly walked to the elevator together, Jaejoong still holding his phone. “Aish, he isn’t answering!”

“Maybe his battery is dead. Stop worrying about him.” Yunho pulled Jaejoong into an empty elevator.

“But … but …” Jaejoong stammered after the doors slid close and just before Yunho’s hand sneakily found its way around his waist. “Of course I worry about him. He’s my brother!”

~*~*~

Dr. Shim Changmin studiously read through the patient’s file as he made his way towards the ward. Once there, he didn’t look through the transparent glass door. Instead, he just walked in, eyes still on the file. He opened his mouth, ready to recite the greeting that he had memorised off by heart.

When he looked up, however, all that came out of his mouth was a gasp.

“Jaejoong hyung?”

The patient lifted his head and rolled his eyes. Then Changmin noticed that the patient had dark black hair, instead of Jaejoong’s stylish mix of brown and dirty blonde. He also wore a scowl on his face, something Jaejoong rarely did.

Changmin looked at the file again and found the patient’s name. He was …

“CHANGSHIK-AH!!”

Neither Changmin nor the patient had time to look at the door before Jaejoong whizzed in and leaped on the bed. The oncologist grabbed the patient’s shoulders and shook him.

“Why didn’t you answer my calls? Why didn’t you call me? Huh? Why didn’t you tell me that you’re here? Why didn’t you tell me you were sick? Huh? Huh??”

Changmin stared at this strange picture. Jaejoong hyung was on the patient’s bed, shaking the life out of the irritated man. A man who looked exactly like him.

Changmin did not notice that he had been staring until a hand waved in front of his face. Quickly shaking his head, Changmin handed the patient’s file to Yunho. “Patient coughed blood, has low BP and platelet count. I’ve checked the hospital records. He has never been admitted to this hospital or any other hospitals in the district, so I couldn’t get a proper medical history. I'd planned on asking him myself but …”

He trailed off, sparing a glance at the two identical individuals on the bed. Both were speaking at the same time, in a bunch of wordy mess. Jaejoong was talking a hundred miles an hour in his hometown accent while the other was mumbling in annoyance, arms stubbornly crossed over his chest. It was quite a sight.

Yunho expertly scanned the file and returned it to Changmin. “Go ahead with the medical history. Once you’re done, go to the discussion room for the differential diagnosis.” He looked at the pair of brothers, who were bickering like seven-year-olds on the bed. “Jaejoong-ah, come on. Let Changmin do his work.”

Jaejoong stared at Yunho with wide eyes. “I want to stay! I can help with the medical history. He's my twin brother!”

“You have a brother?” Changmin blurted out before he could stop himself. “I thought you had eight sisters and no brothers?"

Instantly, the room fell into silence.

The dark-haired patient “hmph”ed and turned his head away, refusing to look at the other occupants of the room.

Jaejoong and Yunho shared a thoughtful look. The looks on the two doctors’ faces were so solemn that Changmin felt a shiver run down his back.

~*~*~

“How come I’m the only one who doesn’t know about this?” Changmin demanded, taken aback by the news.

“You were still in medical school when Jaejoong hyung first found out,” explained Dr. Park Yoochun. “We didn’t want to distract you from your studies.”

Dr. Kim Junsu nodded in agreement. “We’d just graduated back then, but you were still in fourth year. By the time you finished your final exam, we'd already left Korea to specialise.”

“How did you first meet Changshik?” asked Changmin curiously. After all, it isn’t everyday you hear that your hyung has a long-lost identical twin.

“It was by accident, truthfully.” Jaejoong admitted. “Remember when Kangin’s mentor got accused of negligence many years ago? I followed them to the hearing. I hadn’t started working yet then, so I had time. Changshik was the defense attorney’s protégé back then. We sort of … bumped into each other.

“We talked several times, but I could tell that Changshik wasn’t as happy as I was. He didn’t even know that he was adopted. He grew up with no one but his foster mother, who died when he was 15. He was used to living alone, so my appearance must have been a great shock to him. He refused to believe it at first, but I managed to make him agree to a DNA test. The result was positive.

“Then I had to leave for UK to continue my studies. Changshik wanted to continue his mentorship. So we split for several years. When I returned here, I wanted to make up for all the years I was missing.”

“Basically Jaejoong wants to be the brother he never got the chance to be,” Yunho cut in. “But Changshik doesn’t want it.”

Jaejoong nodded sadly. “I still try, though. We agree to meet at least once a month and always keep each other informed. But …” He sighed and Yunho patted his back soothingly.

“Enough of this,” Yunho said sternly. “We’re here to discuss the diagnosis, not family history.”

Yoochun put on his spectacles and flipped open Changshik’s file. “The last time I checked, his platelet count was still below normal. This could be what caused him to cough up blood earlier."

“The most likely cause for low platelet count is an autoimmune disease,” said Junsu. “Immune thrombocytopenic purpura. His antibodies are killing off his own clotting system.”

“There are other causes too,” reminded Changmin. “Leukaemia. Lupus. Cirrhosis.”

“I suggest we do a blood test again,” Junsu continued. “We know something is wrong with his platelets ... We need to make sure the other components of his blood are normal.”

“You guys can rule out leukaemia,” said Jaejoong. “He doesn’t show the right symptoms. Besides, if he has leukaemia, then I’d be sick too. We’re genetically identical.”

“But if it is leukaemia, it’ll be serious,” remarked Yunho. “I’ll take a sample of his bone marrow. Changmin, take his blood sample and run a peripheral blood smear microscopy. Look carefully at his red and white blood cells. Junsu and Yoochun, you two get a MRI of his liver and spleen. And his brain, while you’re at it.”

“His brain … to rule out leukaemia?” asked Junsu as he and Yoochun stood up.

“And any neurological defects,” Yunho answered coolly. “Make it quick. His platelet count is plummeting and we still don’t know why.”

Once the other three had left, Jaejoong grabbed Yunho’s arm, preventing him from exiting the room. “May I go with you?”

“You’re not part of the team.”

“I know. I won’t get in your way.”

“You're a blood relation to the patient.”

Jaejoong laughed dryly. “It’s not like he sees me as a brother, does he? He's never even called me ‘hyung’.”

“It’s against the rules.”

“I know.”

They stared into each other’s eyes, neither relenting. Finally Yunho shook Jaejoong’s hand off and slid the door open. As Jaejoong followed him all the way to Changshik’s ward, neither of them spoke.

~*~*~

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?” Changshik shrieked, pushing down the edge of his gown and scooting away from Yunho. “WHAT IS THAT HUGE NEEDLE FOR?”

Still holding the instrument needed to collect the sample, Yunho had this urge to slap his forehead. Or better yet, poke the sharp end of the syringe into Changshik’s larynx so that he’d stop screaming.

Jaejoong, on the other hand, chose a gentler and more conservative method. “Shh, relax, Changshik-ah,” he placated, gripping his brother’s hand. “He’s just taking a sample of your bone marrow. It won’t hurt.”

“I’m not an idiot!” Changshik screamed. After putting as much distance between himself and the scary tall doctor as possible, he had unintentionally placed himself closer to Jaejoong. “I know what bone marrow is. I know how deep he’s going to poke me. Get him away from me!”

Yunho gave in to his first urge and slapped his own forehead in vexation. Putting down the big syringe, he opened a drawer and took out a smaller syringe. While Changshik was busy shouting at Jaejoong (“Don’t let him touch me!”), Yunho grabbed his shoulder and injected sedative into his arm.

Changshik could only emit an outraged cry before slowly going flaccid. His eyes rolled back and he fell backwards onto the mattress, eyes closed and body completely still.

Jaejoong held Changshik’s lifeless hand and only watched silently as Yunho successfully collected the sample he needed from Changshik’s thigh.

“If I knew he was going to be such a big baby, I wouldn’t have bothered,” declared Yunho flatly.

Jaejoong put down Changshik’s hand and straightened up. As soon as he did so, however, a loud beeping sound emanated from the machines flanking Changshik’s bed. The two doctors quickly studied the monitor and blanched at the single horizontal green line on the screen.

“What did you do?” Jaejoong shouted, panicked.

Yunho put the syringe away and quickly threw Changshik’s blanket off of him. “Me? I was nowhere near his heart!” The dark-haired man was still unconscious, oblivious that his heart had just stopped beating.

Jaejoong sprinted across the room, flung the door open and yelled, “V-FIB!”

Nurses piled into the room, pushing in a machine on a trolley: the defibrillator. Before Jaejoong could reach for the paddles, Yunho pushed him away and snatched them. “Stand back,” he ordered, and Jaejoong stumbled backwards several steps, fear gluing him to one spot.

“Charge!” The defibrillator made a high-pitched sound and Yunho pressed the paddles to Changshik’s chest and a strong electrical current sent Changshik's body jolting up. The beeping still went on, and Yunho screamed, “360, Charge!” and repeated the process again. Jaejoong pressed a hand over his mouth.

After another jolt, the beeping decreased in volume, returning to its normal rhythm. Jaejoong looked at the monitor and sighed in relief when he saw that the blood pressure and pulse were being detected again. The green line was no longer flat, but showed orderly, regular peaks.

Yunho replaced the paddles and told the nurses to leave. Once they were alone again, Yunho went over to Jaejoong and pulled him into a tight hug. Jaejoong’s fingernails clawed at the back of Yunho’s coat as he pushed himself against his boyfriend. He heard his own heart beating like crazy and he knew Yunho could hear it too.

“He’s back,” Yunho whispered in his ear, rubbing his back. “He’s back.”

Jaejoong looked over Yunho’s shoulder and glanced at Changshik. His hair was more ruffled than before, but other than that, there were no signs that he had almost died. “There was nothing wrong with his heart before, right?”

“Right.”

“Does immune thrombocytopenic purpura cause heart failures?”

Yunho held Jaejoong tighter, his own muscles tensed. “No.”

“Then he has something else. What does he have? Yunho-yah, what is wrong with my brother?”

“I don’t know.”

They stayed like that for a while, Jaejoong quivering a little. Changshik remained how he was, appearing like he was doing nothing more than sleeping. Suddenly, a light whoosh disturbed the tense atmosphere and a small squeak followed. The couple pulled back slightly and looked at the door.

A young man was standing in the doorway, nervously glancing from the two doctors to the man on the bed and back again.

“Um, hi,” he greeted, breaking the awkward silence. “I’m Ryeowook, Changshik-shi’s protégé and assistant. Did I come at a bad time?”

=to be continued=

A/N: How was it? :3 I wanted to finish this, but I have class in 2 hours and I haven't done my homework yet. I'm still trying out this Universe. How long this Universe is going to be depends on the response. I'll continue if people want me to.

And about Changshik ... those who read Godsend must have known about my unhealthy obsession towards him. xD So don't be surprised if you see him in any of my fics.

So, um, please comment. ^_______^ Have a nice day.

p/s If you like this Universe, please visit this post and give your opinions. Thank you. :D

Question!!

Mon, 25 Feb 2008 15:08:17 GMT

Hello, it's me again!! xD Just wanna ask you a quick question. This post is public, so anyone can drop by and give their two cents. ^-^

Remember Sugar Drop? The Doctors AU I wrote last year? (gosh, such a long time ago. Time flies!!) I haven't abandoned that Universe, don't worry! I plan on writing more episodes, since I actually find myself liking Yunho's character in this. He is just so ... asdcfb HAWT!! xD I've finally given the Universe a proper name. Since I was inspired by "House", I'm naming this "Jung Yunho, M.D." :DDD That sounds so lame, yet feels so right!! What do you all think?? :3

Speaking of that, I want to ask you a question. As you all know, I am no medical student. I am just a fresh high school graduate. So of course, I don't know much about the medical stuff they talk about in House or E.R. Truthfully, this is the only issue keeping me from continuing this Universe. I have some plots and stuff, but no cases. Recently, I've thought about just adopting the medical cases from any episode of House but applying it into my Universe. So the Dong Bang boys (turned Doctors) will be dealing with the same cases, but the way they do it will be different, since they have different personalities from the cast of House. The problem is there will be spoilers for the show, of course. Dx I've only watched House until Season 3 though, so there'll be more chances of readers giving me spoilers than the other way around. 8D

Please don't get me wrong. I'd love to be original. The only reason I am even considering this is because I've seen other writers do it before (adapting DBSK into an existing Universe but changing it slightly to suit the characters) and because plot bunnies for this Universe has been haunting my head (and my sleep) - especially Yunjae.

So .. I want to know whether any of you mind me lifting cases from House? If you don't like that, then I'm afraid I can only write one more episode and then this Universe will die just like that. If that's fine with readers, then I have about 3 episodes in mind.

I'll make it simpler, of course. I won't choose very complicated cases. Like Sugar Drop, I'll keep the case clean and clear and focus more on the characters' interactions.

So .. please tell me what you think. I really love this Universe and I'd hate to have it buried in dust. Imagine the possibilities!! I'd appreciate all your opinions. Please be honest. I'll go with whichever I feel I can survive with. ^^

Thank you!!!

[Fic] Godsend (10/?) Pt. I

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:32:19 GMT

Title: Godsend
Length: Series, (10/?) Pt. 1/3
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: JaeHo/YunJae, YooSu
Genre: Sci-fi, Adventure, Drama
Summary: Set in Vacation 1 Universe. A year after their ‘vacation’, Yoochun gets catapulted to the future and witnesses something horrible. Now, back in the present, he needs to prevent the future he has seen from happening.
Requirements: Must Watch Vacation 1 First.

Season 1<

Season 2

10.0 Just You and I - Part 1

Please add my writing LJ here to read.

Disclaimer: This fic, although based on real people, is a pure work of fiction and does not reflect true occurrances, views and orientations. No financial profit has been made in the production of this fic. "Heroes" is created by Tim Kring.

[Fic] Godsend (9/?) Pt. II

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 14:32:20 GMT

Title: Godsend
Length: Series, (9/?) Pt. 2
Author: Isami J. Mayhard
Rating: Overall NC-17
Pairings: JaeHo/YunJae, YooSu
Genre: Sci-fi, Adventure, Drama

Summary: Set in Vacation 1 Universe. A year after their ‘vacation’, Yoochun gets catapulted to the future and witnesses something horrible. Now, back in the present, he needs to prevent the future he has seen from happening.

Requirements: Must Watch Vacation 1 First.

Season 1

Season 2:

8.0 Dead End: Part 1 | Part 2
9.0 With Me, Eternally: Part 1

A big fat Thank you to ladydusk_raku for proofreading this!

Notes for this chapter only (both parts):

Warning #1: This chapter does not feature any of the DBSK boys except Jaejoong. This chapter is what I dub "Changshik's Chapter" because this chapter is all about him and what happened to him that gave rise to this story in the first place. So if you don't find Changshik half as interesting as I do, this chapter might bore you to tears. I won't even mind if you skip this chapter altogether (if you skip this, you might as well skip Chapter 10 as well). This is also the chapter where I throw Science out the window, so it might come across as slightly different from the previous chapters.

Warning#2: A lot of dying and violence (and I am not kidding with this).

Warning#3: Major Spoilers for Vacation: The Way U Are, so if for some reason you haven't watched that yet, please do. :3

The events in this chapter occur after Part 1 and Vacation. I apologise for any OCC-ness or errors on my part. I hope you'll enjoy this ... and not get bored.

* * *

Season 2

CHAPTER 9.5

GODSEND: WITH ME, ETERNALLY (Part II)

Outside, cars and ambulances were parked side-by-side on the parking lot. The streetlights formed strange orange images on their roofs, making them all look the same and their different colours indistinguishable.

On the ground floor, the lights at the lobby were turned on brightly, even though people were scarce. Even the clerks had gone home. A security guard clutched onto his weapon as though hugging a bolster, his head bobbing back and forth as he struggled to remain awake.

In the left wing, the clinic was closed.

In the right wing, an E&R team was sending electric shocks through a man who was lying lifelessly on a mattress that was already coloured with his blood, in an endeavour to electrocute his heart back to life. Screams could be heard, jumbled and shuffled. There was some confusion among the new staff. Inexperienced nurses scurried about like squat cockroaches, and doctors had to yell to set them straight.

Compared to the havoc and noise in the right wing, the fifth floor carried an air of serenity. Changshik was sitting on a plastic stool, his body tilted forward and the side of his face resting on his mother’s blanket-covered thigh. Even when he slept, his hand gripped hers tightly, careful not to entangle the tubes. His mother’s ward was located at the end of the level, far away from the elevators and the nurses’ counter, a great distance from any activity that could have gone on during the dead of the night.

The surgery had been carried out without much trouble. Changshik had waited outside the operation theatre for hours, hours – for eternity and another hour. The doctor had informed him that his mother’s stats were within the normal range throughout the procedure. She had been transferred to the recovery ward until she gains consciousness.

And Changshik had to wait some more.

When he woke up at seven in the morning, his mother was still how she was before. A nurse was replacing his mother’s IV drips bag with a fresh one. She pointed at a hand towel on the bedside table and told Changshik that it was for him. The young man nodded and muttered an awkward “Thanks”.

“Have you called your other family members?” asked the nurse amiably, walking to the windows to pull back the curtains and letting the morning sunlight brighten up the room.

“I’m the only one she has,” Changshik croaked, rubbing his eyes. His throat was sore; he had not spoken to anyone since the surgery. He had even forgotten to drink.

The nurse pursed her lips in understanding. She had been doing this job for more than a decade; she had seen her fair share of misery and pain. “Try talking to her,” she suggested, her feet not making a sound as she walked towards the door. “Research has shown that it helps.”

Changshik waited until the nurse was out and the door had swung closed before taking the hand towel. When he held it in his hand, he realised that it was damp with warm water. He folded it neatly and gently dabbed his mother’s face with it. The oxygen mask was in the way, so he could only wipe her forehead and cheeks.

“Umma,” he rasped before clearing his throat and trying again. “Umma, please wake up. The surgery went fine. We’re just waiting for you. You just have to wake up, and then we can go ho—.”

Biting back the last word, Changshik moved on to clean her hand. He wiped the skin of her palm and between her fingers. “Umma, you’ll never guessed what happened. Before your surgery, I came. I came, and … I thought I was alone … but … Umma, remember that singer who looks like me? He came too. He was here. He helped us, umma. He came and helped us.”

Her hand was cold and pale, purple veins visible beneath wrinkled skin. Plopping the towel down on the mattress, he took her hand in both of his and brought it to his forehead – a gesture of humility and remorse. “Umma, I’ve done bad things. They’re looking for me. We can’t stay here anymore. Come, we’ll start a new life. Elsewhere. You just have to wake up.”

Changshik paused, no longer able to speak. His vocal chords were numbed by anxiety and dread. He did not know how long it would be before the Boss started looking for him again. Since returning home was out of the question, their only resort was running away. He had to leave everything behind and put as much distance between himself and the Boss as possible. Changshik knew this very well; he hoped that his mother would agree to follow him. The point would be lost otherwise.

A light breeze brushed his eyebrow softly and Changshik sighed, concluding that his life would never be the same again before his shoulders suddenly tensed.

Breeze? ‘The windows aren’t open. There can’t be any wind.’

Changshik jerked his head upwards and stared at his mother, clutching her hand tightly. As he did so, he felt similar tender brushes on his knuckles.

“Umma,” he cried out after seeing his mother’s fingers move. He pushed the stool back, stood up and leaned forward tentatively, urgency and anticipation making his limbs feel stiff and stifled. “Umma, can you hear me?”

The movement was slight, barely noticeable, but when Yungchung twisted her neck to face the direction of his son’s voice, Changshik could not hold back a sob of joy. He called out for the nurses, his throat constricting painfully at every syllable he uttered, and had to dig his upper teeth into his bottom lip to hold back a cry when Yungchung lifted her eyelids.

Their eyes met for a moment before the nurses piled in and Changshik had to step back, eyes wet with tears and a hand obscuring the wide smile on his face.

+ + +

The doctor deemed it a ‘miraculous recovery’ while the staff offered their own wishes of luck and happiness. As soon as she gained consciousness, Yungchung’s condition was well-monitored and showed no problems. She was fit enough to be discharged from the hospital. As a nurse diligently folded the patient’s clothes and arranged them neatly in a bag, Changshik helped his mother onto a wheelchair.

“Did you bring all my clothes, Changshikie?”

The young man lifted his eyebrows at her once she was seated comfortably. “Yes, I did. Why—“

“Well, I was thinking,” Yungchung cut her son off effectively, “if we were going to start a new life elsewhere, I might as well be dressed up for it, right?” She smiled at Changshik, who was kneeling beside her wheelchair and staring at her with wide eyes. She patted him affectionately on the head, adding, “You owe me a long explanation, my dear. I find it remarkable that a famous singer has visited me. Too bad I was in a coma. I could have made him tea.”

Changshik only chuckled. The nurse handed him Yungchung’s bag and informed him that a taxi was already waiting for them. After signing the necessary discharge documents, Changshik pushed his mother’s wheelchair towards the main entrance. He walked slowly at first, but when they reached the lobby, his pace increased into a jog before transforming into a run when they passed the sliding doors.

Yungchung grinned and spread out her arms, enjoying the wind beating on her face. Her expression was happy and young, delighted by the prospect of escaping the life she had been anchored to since the beginning of her life. The same life she had forced Changshik into.

“Where are we going?” she asked once they had loaded the trunk and boarded the taxi.

Changshik smile was confident and almost similar to his mother’s. “Just leave everything to me, umma.”

Yungchung leaned back and praised God for giving her such a wonderful son.

~*~*~

Once the taxi exited the hospital compound, two pairs of feet stepped on the trail of smoked debris the vehicle left behind. Jaejoong watched the rear of the taxi becoming more distant and small before it turned a corner and disappeared from sight. He looked up at the hospital façade, reminiscing his first time entering the premise the previous year. It seemed like a long time ago, some distant memory that didn’t even feel like his own.

Of course; he was in Changshik’s memory now.

“Where did you go after that?” he asked. Changshik – the one who had brought him there – made a rustling sound with his feet, causing Jaejoong to divert his attention from the hospital to the man (well, soul) beside him.

“Like I said, umma and I lived in hiding. The Boss holds a grudge against me, now that I’ve used his money and disappeared. We moved around a lot, but umma didn’t mind. In fact, I think she was glad to get away from the Boss, too.”

“For how long?”

“We lived quite happily for almost a year. Ten months, if you want me to be specific. I found a job and we got a nice home. Umma was delighted with the change. She made new friends and adapted quickly. Then, one day, the happy life I thought I could share with umma crashed around me.”

Just like Changshik’s words, the scenery around them cracked and fell into pieces. The new setting was a corridor of a different apartment. The walls looked cleaner and newer from the ones Changshik grew with in his childhood. The air smelled nicer and everything looked prettier. Jaejoong could tell that it was a good place and environment to live in.

Another Changshik, this time more similar to the one beside Jaejoong, sauntered into view. He was wearing a smart grey uniform (of a hotel or some sort), his hair falling stylishly over his forehead and ears. His ear stud gleamed magnificently under the fluorescent lights as he jogged towards his home. Stopping in front of the door, he twisted his key and entered the dark apartment.

After switching on the lights and tossing his bag on the dining table, Changshik went to the living area. Their new house was more spacious and luxurious than their old home, but the basic rule still applied. Every inch of space and furniture was functional. Everything was tucked into their respective places to avoid clutter.

“Umma?” Changshik’s voice quivered. He strode around the apartment, eyes darting about. “Umma? Where are you?”

He entered the kitchen, walking in caution. Jaejoong followed carefully behind him, the dead silence disturbing even to him. The soul-Changshik stayed in the doorway, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest. As the soul watched with detached interest, his memory-self slowly walked towards the refrigerator. A note was attached to the surface with a magnet. Shaking, he ran his eyes over the message.

Then a look of utter horror flashed across his face. Ripping the note from the fridge, he sprinted out of the door.

“Where is he — I mean, where were you going?” asked Jaejoong in alarm. “What was on the note?”

“It was from the Boss,” explained Changshik. “He got umma and if I want her to be safe, I must hand myself over.”

“Where was she?”

In reply to his question, their surroundings swirled and morphed into something else. The warm and cosy ambiance of Changshik’s home disappeared. Instead, stale, musky air irritated Jaejoong’s nose, the sudden unpleasant heat making him uncomfortable. He felt rough dirt and pebbles under his feet. After rubbing dust from his eyes, Jaejoong observed the new location.

Changshik had brought him to a large warehouse and Jaejoong gawked at the sheer size of it. It was as large as a football field, probably twice the width. The ceiling was about twenty metres above their heads, the beige wooden planks already weakening with age and threatened to collapse at any time. Light streamed through the tiny windows, which were merely rectangular holes made by shattering the bricks. The interior was mostly bare, with only rocks and rusted metal scraps being stored there.

But on that day, the warehouse held more people than it had ever housed in many years. Jaejoong and Changshik stood a safe distance from a cluster of people who gathered at the centre, all wearing black clothes on their robust bodies and scowls on their nasty faces. In the middle of the crowd, memory-Changshik stood with his back bent forward. A side of his face was smeared with blood and multiple cuts lined his forearms. Even though he was panting and his knees quivered in suppressed pain, his eyes bore the fiercest anger that if looks could kill, Yongnam would have erupted into flames.

Changshik could only grit his teeth as a pair of men held his mother in place beside Yongnam.

“I’ve given you so much, Changshik-ah, and this is how you repay me?” said Yongnam, sneering contemptuously. “You steal my money and disappear just like that? Without even a Thank you?”

“Let her go,” asserted Changshik. “I’m your problem. Not her.”

Jaejoong felt a hand slipping into his. He glanced at Changshik’s hand, which was grasping tightly onto his fingers, and looked up at him. “I don’t need my hand being held.”

“I know,” the soul replied, bowing his head. His bangs obscured his eyes and any emotions that could have leaked through them. “But I do.”

Jaejoong felt that horrible tightening of his chest again. Gripping Changshik’s hand, he watched the scene unfold before his eyes.

~*~*~

Changshik didn’t put up a fight. His mother did.

“Don’t give yourself to him, Changshikie!” she yelled, struggling against the men’s hold. “Run! Run away!”

Changshik was ready to surrender. He lifted his hands to his shoulders. Upon seeing this, Yungchung let out a scream and lunged forward, breaking free. She ran towards her son, but before she could reach him, a loud sound of gunshot ripped through the air.

It shattered the tense atmosphere and struck Changshik’s eardrums. Amidst the harsh noise, there was a smaller sound: a ripping of flesh, a dripping of liquid and a gasp.

The whole world seemed to decelerate, everything running in slow motions. Everything around him faded to a blur of orange and brown. He could only see his mother; she was facing him, arms spread out and eyes wide. A bullet had punctured the right side of her chest, leaving a gaping red hole, dark blood oozing out of it and staining her clothes, the ground. She must have felt it. She must have seen the horror on Changshik’s face, because she had stopped running.

He must have screamed, but even if he did, he wouldn’t have known. All he heard was the sound of his mother’s body hitting the ground and the eerie echo that followed.

“UMMA!” He threw himself beside her and lifted her into his arms. Another scream exited his throat, and he could hear himself clearly. “UMMA! UMMA!” He turned her towards him and shook her frail body. She didn’t move. He hugged her closer, feeling for a pulse, a heartbeat, a breath, or any signs that indicate she was alive. But it was difficult. He kept on confusing her heartbeat with his own, her breaths with his own and her pain with his own. He glared at Yongnam.

“Why did you shoot her?” he demanded, shouting over the lump forming in his throat. “WHY DID YOU SHOOT HER? SHE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!”

Yongnam staggered back, as though the force of Changshik’s voice struck him like a physical blow to the chest. In one swift movement, he shoved his gun into his coat and sprinted out the exit, his guards tailing after him. Most of the other subordinates stayed behind, getting ready to beat Changshik senseless if he tried to chase after their Boss.

Changshik felt ferocious rage rising inside him. He wanted to chase after Yongnam, to squeeze his neck until his eyes bulge and pop out of their sockets. But he couldn’t leave his mother alone. He sensed movement in his arms. He glanced down. His mother was looking up at him, tears streaming down the corners of her eyes in thin lines. The thought of Yongnam slipped from his mind.

“Umma … why did you do it?” he sobbed. “You could have been safe.”

He could feel warm blood seeping into his trousers and if he glanced down, he would see just how deep the wound was. They were close, but he still could not feel his mother’s heartbeat. It was already too weak to be sensed purely by proximity. Her breaths were jagged and when she raised a hand to touch his face, it was shaking.

“He can’t have you. He must never have you,” she rasped. “Promise me you’ll never give in. Promise me you’ll be with me, eternally.”

“Yes, umma,” Changshik cried desperately, voice cracking. “Eternally. Don’t leave me.”

“You’re my precious,” she murmured, smiling as though in bliss. “You’re strong, Changshikie. You’re … strong …” With one last breath from her lips, the hand grazing his cheek fell limply onto her lap. When he looked at her, her eyes were closed and her whole body was as stiff as stone. She was gone. Gone. Gone.

The lump inside Changshik’s throat burst into storms of infuriated screams as he held her body closer, burying his face at the base of her neck, taking in her scent, now stale and sour with blood. He rocked her body, coaxing her to move, speak, anything. “Umma … don’t leave me … umma…”

Between his murmurs, he heard a scraping sound, reminding him that Yongnam’s lackeys were still around. They were all still there, watching, standing, alive.

Then all his grief transformed into rage. Something in his brain was triggered, flooding his senses with a horrible power. Laying his mother gently onto the ground, he pushed himself up. Fresh blood dripped from his trousers and he saw red all over.

He felt nothing but fury. Madness ravished his mind as he grabbed the man nearest to him and rammed his knee into his stomach. He heard bones crack, vessels burst and organs halt. When he released him, the man was already dead.

The others now saw him as a threat and moved to attack him. Changshik evaded each blow easily and punched and kicked anything he could reach. A single swing of his arm sent men flying off in many directions. A simple punch to the chest broke ribs and punctured lungs. Even when a man had fallen down and was defenceless, Changshik would clamber over him and bash his face and bash bash bash until blood flooded beneath skin and the man’s face became swollen beyond recognition. He ripped limbs apart, breaking bodies into pieces. He was so mad that he didn’t notice real power pulsing through his veins. He was using the power without shame, and he didn’t even realise it.

~*~*~

It was ghastly. The sight was gruesome. It was so horrible that Jaejoong had to look away. Beside him, Changshik mirrored his actions. Only when the sounds stopped did they turn back.

Memory-Changshik knelt beside his mother and took her into his arms. He lifted her up, the blood on his hands mixing with hers. Leaving an evidence of a massacre behind, he tore out of the warehouse, wailing.

They fell into darkness. Jaejoong and Changshik stayed there for a while, both taking time to revive from the horrible sight they had just witnessed. Jaejoong’s knees buckled. He fell onto the black surface and sat there, shaking violently, hugging himself. Even when he had his eyes screwed shut, the bloody images still lingered behind his eyelids. “That was horrible,” he muttered. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“It’s the past, Jaejoong-shi,” Changshik replied sadly, kneeling next to him. “Eternal is just a juvenile promise. Umma’s death marked the birth of my powers — and the complete upheaval of my entire life.”

“So that’s your trigger.”

Changshik nodded. “Are you ready for our next destination?”

“There’s more?” the singer exclaimed, horrified. “I don’t think I can take any more.”

Changshik sent him a tight smile. “I haven’t died yet, right? That’s what you want to see, isn’t it? My death?”

Jaejoong shook his head. “I’ve changed my mind. I don’t want to see it. I want to go back.”

“We’ve come this far. We can’t go back.” He extended a hand to Jaejoong, who accepted it with his own shaking one. “After my mother died, I didn’t know who else to go to aside from Mangchi hyung. While I was shaken with grief, he took care of the necessary preparations for umma’s burial. That’s when I decided to get revenge.”

~*~*~

Moisture from the wet grass seeped into his trousers as he knelt in front of the tombstone, his palms together and hands held up in front him in a praying gesture. Mangchi hyung had taught him the suitable passages to recite and the prayers to mutter under his breath. He recited them perfectly, adding some prayers of his own. He had never been very pious, but Yungchung was. Changshik’s body clenched at the memory of his mother sacrificing himself for him. If there were anyone who deserved to rest in peace, it would be her.

The elder man had not made a sound, but Changshik knew that Mangchi hyung was standing behind him, hands clasped behind him in a timid fashion as his eyes nervously scanned their surroundings. He had been dumbfounded when Changshik appeared outside his home, red and wet and carrying a bloody corpse in his arms. The young man had collapsed right after that, leaving the elder waiter to clean up after him.

Changshik had remained unconscious for three days. By the time he woke up, Yungchung had already been buried. Knowing the young man, Mangchi had thought Changshik would throw a fit at not having a chance to say goodbye to his mother and was astonished when Changshik just nodded in acceptance and asked to be taught how to pray.

Mangchi bounced on his heels nervously. Changshik had only given brief accounts on what had happened in the past 10 months, but that still did not quell his worry. “Changshik-ah,” he began slowly. “We better get back. If the Boss or any of his men sees me with you—“

“You’ll get in trouble, I know,” Changshik finished for him, standing up. Tugging the front of his cap, he turned and walked away. The graveyard was set up on a hill, with slots of marble stones stationed in neat rows down the slope. As he descended the stone steps, a tentative hand brushing the railing, Mangchi followed right after him. “Thank you for what you did. I won’t bother you anymore.”

“The Boss is still looking for you, you know.”

“I know.”

“He never really forgave you,” Mangchi started to babble, his words spilling out like fountains. “After he knew you disappeared with your mother, he got really pissed. He was in a foul mood for many months. He kept pestering Mina to tell him if you ever contact her. She agreed, of course, but only because she was scared. Everyone knew that the Boss was still after you, but none of us really knew why. We thought it was because of the money you took, but obsessing over that for 10 months seems ridiculous, even for the Boss.”

Changshik halted his steps, Mangchi copying his movements just a fraction of a second later. He gripped the steel railing so tightly that his knuckled turned white. “I think I know why he’s after me,” he muttered. “He wants this.”

He twisted his wrist, as lightly as one turning a doorknob. The steel railing in his hand distorted and contorted until he could tug a piece of metal out. He heard Mangchi gasp. Glancing at the gap he had made along the railing, he dropped the piece he had been holding onto the ground. “Has he been going anywhere lately? Met anyone?”

“Well, he does go out every night,” Mangchi replied, quivering. “I followed him once. He went to this automobile workshop near the night club. He went in, but his guards waited at the door, so I couldn’t go in. Changshik-ah, you should get back to hiding. It’s dangero—“

“He killed my mother,” Changshik hissed. “I deserve revenge.”

“Ah, don’t speak of that!” Mangchi shrilled. “It’s dangerous. Dangerous!”

“I don’t care!” a single scream rendered Mangchi speechless. “Umma’s dead. I’ve turned into some … freak who can break metal and kill people just by punching their chests. Just let—“ he took a deep breath, “Just let me do this.”

Mangchi stared at him with sad eyes, but Changshik kept his gaze to his left, looking at the hundreds of other gravestones that lined the side of the hill. After what felt like hours, Mangchi spoke, “He goes there around 9. There is a back entrance. It is always locked, but I’m sure you can break it with your, um, anyway, the back entrance can be assessed from the back route. You know the way. I’ve seen you taking that route with Mina before.”

Changshik nodded, remembering the pathway perfectly. It was the place where he had first seen Yongnam with the briefcase. And the man in mechanic’s uniform. He quickly thanked Mangchi hyung and ran down the steps, while the elder man waved forlornly at him.

~*~*~

Unlike their previous shifts from one memory to the next, this one was very bumpy. Jaejoong felt like his entire body was hurled into the air by a giant catapult, his stomach making these crazy swirling motions that made him sick. He gripped Changshik’s arm, afraid that if they separate, he would get lost in the other’s memories with no idea on how to get out.

Jaejoong yelped when he felt himself falling onto something solid. Aside from pressure, he didn’t feel anything. No pain. Neither hot nor cold. He couldn’t even place the texture of the surface he had landed on or hear himself hitting anything.

“Are you all right?”

Nodding, Jaejoong clutched Changshik’s hand with both of his and used it as a leverage to pull himself up. “Where are we?” He was still surrounded by darkness, where the only things visible were Changshik and himself, but he could tell that the setting was different. He smelled the pungent stench of black oil and exhaust fumes. The air was wet, cold and extremely uncomfortable.

Changshik did not answer. He just stared ahead, as if expecting something to appear before him.

Then Jaejoong heard the pit patter of water. When he blinked, he realised that it was drizzling. It was hard to tell, since it was dark and he couldn’t feel water hitting his face. The sky opened, from pitch black to dark violet. The whole area lighted up, and Jaejoong could see his location clearly.

It was a rainy night. They were standing in an alley, in front of a pair of huge metal doors. Circular ripples could be seen forming on small puddles before dispersing into tiny waves. And from somewhere far away, someone was approaching. Running.

A dark silhouette appeared, dashing through the curtains of falling raindrops. His cap had been abandoned, leaving his black hair exposed to the moisture. Droplets perched on his clothes and puddles stained the hem of his jeans. He paused in front of the double doors, just three metres from where Jaejoong and Changshik stood.

Wiping his forehead, the memory-Changshik took a step closer towards the doors, which were bolted together with a complicated-looking lock. He took a step back and, as fast as lightning, rammed his shoulder into the door.

A normal person would have broken his entire arm from the impact. But just with one hard shove from Changshik, the lock broke into two and the heavy metal doors sprang open. He staggered in and Jaejoong, after a moment of hesitation, followed.

The place was dark, the air disgustingly damp. Lightning struck outside and Jaejoong could make out towering shelves of oil containers, all balanced on flimsy metal plates. The ceiling was quite high, but the shelves were arranged very closely together, enough to give Jaejoong a sense of claustrophobia in the darkness.

Jaejoong didn’t like this place, and judging from way cold fingers wrapped around his hand, neither did Changshik.

~*~*~

Changshik prudently walked in, careful as to not to bump into any of shelves, lest one of the bolts falter and send the whole line of shelves tumbling down on him. Prudently watching his steps, he meandered around, searching for another door that could lead him further inside the premises. The only things helping him manoeuvre in the dark workshop were the single line of light that the open door had allowed in and the occasional burst of lightning.

All the shelf units looked the same and the ceiling was too high up to be seen in the dark. Each shelf unit was about eight feet high, ten feet long and only a foot wide. He had to turn his head back every few paces to check just how far he had walked. Beginning to wonder just how big this place was, he peered through the gaps between the containers on the shelves and after some time, saw another smaller door about eighty metres away. He made a wild dash for it, his shoulders narrowly avoiding the shelves.

Suddenly the door creaked open and Changshik dived behind a tall metal shelf unit, crouching on the floor. Two silhouettes emerged from the door.

“Are you sure you heard something?” one of them asked sceptically. “No one comes here. The back entrance is locked and hasn’t been open for a year.”

The man’s companion trotted ahead and Changshik sidled backwards to avoid detection. “I’m sure!” the Boss’s subordinate, the one who was walking ahead, exclaimed. “It was like a loud bang. Didn’t you hear it?”

Changshik saw the first man’s shadow move: he was shaking his head. “No. The Boss’s conversation was more interesting. I never knew such people exist. I feel like I’m in a movie!”

‘So the Boss is beyond that door.’

“Kyun Bin, the Boss has told us to be extra cautious,” replied the other, who paused in his steps, in front of where Changshik was hiding. “We’re under-staffed. Many of us were killed in that slaughter. For all we know, we might be next.”

“Yeah … All that blood,” muttered Kyun Bin, almost reverently. “Only a monster can do something like that. Did you see Kee Jin’s body? He was ripped into three.”

The response to that statement never came — the entire shelf unit that had been properly erect next to them a minute before tilted dangerously to one side, its growing shadow giving the two gangsters only a second’s notice before crushing their bodies. Bottle containers broke out of their orderly queue and plummeted to the floor, spilling out their liquid contents.

Changshik climbed atop of the fallen metal plates, which were inclined at an angle due to the bodies trapped beneath. Walking to the exact spot, he bounced. The metal jerked up and down with a loud rattling sound — and a smaller but horrible ripping of flesh and spurting of blood. If the two gangsters were not dead from the initial impact, they would be now.

The noise attracted the attention of other lackeys, who dashed into the area and, like howling wolves, let out a harsh battle cry. Changshik screamed out his own, clutching the sides of his head. His power had nowhere to go except further inside him and the earth seemed to quiver under him as his power overwhelmed his mind and conscience.

Leaping onto solid ground, he swung his legs and hit anything that moved. Faces were unrecognisable — only blurs that he had to eliminate and reduce to puddles of red. He received strong blows to the back and legs, but he countered without paying any heed to pain.

Then the number of enemies seemed to increase drastically. The rapid blows grew more difficult to evade, even with his augmented strength. He had one body, and that was his only drawback.

Black figures swarmed before his eyes and before he knew it, he was surrounded and a dozen burly bodies immobilized him and something tiny yet sharp poked the back of his neck.

The needle punctured the skin of his nape and released something fluid into his spine. Feeling something foreign and unknown inside him, Changshik threw everyone off him and quickly clutched the back of his neck. As soon as his hand made contact, a piercing pain surged down his backbone and up into his brain, sending him buckling to the ground, shrieking in agony.

The ground was wet and smelly with oil. Footsteps could be heard amidst the screaming. And then a voice. An ugly, hideous voice.

“How does it feel like, Changshik-ah?” Yongnam sneered from somewhere three metres away. That fucking coward. If he had the balls, he could have come nearer, so that Changshik could grab onto his ankles and — “Does it hurt? Does it hurt more than when your umma died?”

Changshik tried to get up, but the pain was spreading, pricking every nerve in his body. He fell again, his cheek landing on a shallow puddle of oil. Some of the fluid entered his mouth and he spat it out, feeling a lurch in his chest when he did so. Stop it. Stop the pain. Stop. Stop. “What did you do?”

Yongnam crouched down, but he was still too far. “My friend invented this ingenious concoction. A bit of it will cause your brain to send messages of pain throughout your body. I see it works pretty well.”

Changshik caught a glimpse of someone in a mechanic uniform somewhere in his peripheral vision, but his vision was getting blurry. The pain was getting more excruciating now. He managed to rasp, “Why don’t you just kill me?”

Yongnam cackled. “Just like how I killed your mom? Oh I can’t do that.”

“Why?” ‘Make it stop. Make it stop.’ His voice was turning hoarse, his eyes watering, and he inwardly cursed. “What are you … going to do …”

“With you? Good question.” Yongnam started pacing, still out of Changshik’s reach. His men stayed back, letting their Boss do as he pleases. “I don’t think you remember this, but when you were young, I made a deal with your mother. I made you two stay, where I can keep an eye on the both of you. After several years, I started to get bored. I was ready to get rid of both of you — but I met a friend. I was speaking to him when my car passed by your school. You were still in high school, then. Remember? He saw you, and then he said something to me that made me change my mind.

“He said,” Yongnam strode to Changshik’s lying figure and planted a foot on the young man’s shoulder, “that you’re a mutant.”

Changshik slapped Yongnam’s leg away, but his body was already spent from fighting the pain. The result was nothing more than a tap.

“I’ve always thought that you have a strange face. Scary, even.” Yongnam retreated a couple of steps and resumed his pacing. “Who would have guessed that it’s because you have a mutant gene in your body? You’re a real freak of nature. I was sceptical at first, and then he showed me proof and opportunities that I couldn’t possibly ignore. I let you live, just to feed my curiosity. I did everything I could to keep you. After you finished high school, I gave you a job. When you were starting to get bored, I gave you a girlfriend!”

“Mina …” Changshik gasped. He hasn’t said that name in almost a year. No, it couldn’t be… “You paid Mina to be with me?”

Yongnam’s eyes widened comically. “Oh no!” he declared, waving his hands. “I just gave her a job at the right time. It’s just my luck that she’s your type and you two hooked up right away. She doesn’t know that you’re a freak. She loves you sincerely. Of course, I wonder if she’d still love you if she knew.”

“Does … Did umma know?”

“I told her, I did. I was hoping she’d cooperate, but you know Yungchung — she was too stubborn. She said you weren’t a freak. But you know what? I think she actually believed me. Of course, if there was anyone who’d notice anything weird about you, it’d be your mother, wouldn’t it? But despite that,” Yongnam continued with a manic glint in his eyes, “I knew she was the only thing keeping me away from you. So I had to eliminate her, right? Now with she’s gone, I can sell you.”

“SELL ME?” Changshik screamed, the force of the pain propelling his voice out, his fists pounding the ground in frustration. “WHO THE FUCK GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO SELL ME?”

“You probably don’t remember this, boy,” Yongnam said coolly, but only after scrambling backwards several steps, “I supported you all through your childhood. And you used my money. It’s natural that I’d want a replacement for that, right?”

Changshik dug his fingernails into his own cheeks and pressed down, forcing his eyes to stay open. His nose detected the reek of oil on his hand and realised that the puddle of oil he was lying on was larger than he had previously thought. His senses were already numbed by the pain, but he could tell that he was drenched, the pungent liquid clinging onto his clothes.

“I’ve sent your profile to the company that seeks creatures like you,” explained the Boss further, enjoying the fleeting sense of victory. “They’ve already given me the deposit. Did you know, boy, that the money you took from me ... was actually the money I got for telling them about you?”

His blurry vision caught sight of a black silhouette about three metres from him. It was one of the men he had pounded on before Yongnam arrived. Pushing the ground with his knees, Changshik scurried, on all fours, towards the corpse — the pain and slippery oil making his short quest near impossible.

Yongnam’s sinister laughter rang like the unpleasant chime of giant, rusty bells. “They’ll do stuff to you, I’m sure. My friend said that they’ll use you to find the others of your kind. But I figured, you know, that if I can make use of you, I can sell more of you, right?”

Upon reaching the dead body, Changshik searched through the man’s pockets. His fingers were jerking uncontrollably when he found a packet of cigarettes in one of the pockets. Of course, all gangsters smoked. And all smokers carried around with them a —

A lighter. He grabbed the small tube and held it in his trembling hands, wanting nothing more than the pain to stop. Stop and leave.

He flicked the lighter. His damp thumb slipped at first, but he tried again. He tried until a tiny flame appeared at the mouth of the lighter, which he then brought close to his face.

The Boss’s lackeys moved in to stop him, but Yongnam barked out an order that caused all of them to freeze in their respective spots. “Kim Changshik,” there was tremor in the man’s voice, “Don’t be stupid. You serve a bigger purpose if you stay alive.”

“My life has never served any purpose,” retorted Changshik, his nose taking in the smell of smoke in one long drag. “Other than being someone else’s entertainment.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Yongnam repeated, showing a frightened smile. “Don’t do it. I’ve already shown your pretty face to them.”

Changshik laughed bitterly, the pain tearing at his insides. “So you like this pretty face? Then it has to go first.”

Closing his eyes, he drove the mouth of the lighter into his face, ignoring the cries of deprecation around him.

The flame kissed the skin on his cheek and grew to caress his forehead, lips and the bridge of his nose. Heat ran their fingers through his hair, roasting them with just one touch. His hand dropped the lighter, which fell on his lap, planting a seed of fire there before hitting the ground with a click!

Everything after that was an exhilarating blur of orange flame and great, black shadows dominating the space in the spacious area. There were sounds of droplets, of liquids being trampled upon, of metal gashing against metal and flesh and screams of torment as flames, taller than even the tallest among them, galloped all over the place, following the trails of spilt oil and swallowing everything, every being, in their paths. Figures ran for their lives, with neither direction nor nous, bumping into each other and screaming without coherency.

Changshik’s body titled to the left and fell onto the ground, the fire already licking off the right side of his body. The flames chewed on his flesh, reducing him to charred pieces of meat. The pain escalated, hurtling towards the apex of agony, but never reaching it, as if the journey there was never ending. Changshik wondered, as his tissues burned due to depleted oxygen, if his mother was ever in this much pain when she drew her last breath.

Then it came. The worst feeling imaginable and worse. Death tunnelled Its fingers through Changshik’s hair and yanked. It yanked and he screamed. Screamed like never before. The pain was nothing in this world, fathomless and beyond comprehension. All his organs transformed into thorns, pricking his insides and bones and inner core as his soul was ripped out of his body.

~*~*~

Changshik would have collapsed to the ground if Jaejoong had not caught him in time. Their grip on each other’s hand loosened and Jaejoong wrapped his arms around the soul, solid and quivering in his embrace. The heat was grazing Jaejoong’s face and it was unbearable, because in this strange world, he could not sweat. He exhaled through his mouth and his breath filtered through Changshik’s hair.

An agonised scream slashed through the air with deadly strength, and Jaejoong could not bring himself to look at Changshik’s last moments alive. In turn, he focussed on the one he was holding, supporting.

Changshik had his face pressed against Jaejoong’s shoulder, his hands grasping the singer’s sides, balling the fabric of the latter’s shirt in fists. “Happy now?” he rasped, his voice croaking as if he was speaking with sandpaper stuck in his throat. “Are you happy now?”

Jaejoong shook his head firmly, hugging Changshik tighter. “No.” He felt horrible. The back of his eyes burned with suppressed tears, but he could not bring them out. Not here; it was too hot. Not now; not when Changshik was crying in his arms. “No,” he repeated.

“I learned … I learned everything … I’ve told you …” Changshik gasped, “after … after my death. I … got you into this … mess. I must warn you … must get you to …”

“Shh … you don’t have to explain.” The fire had grown larger and deadlier now, but Jaejoong tried to ignore it. No matter how uncomfortable it made him, the fire couldn’t hurt him. He laid his cheek against Changshik’s hair while the soul’s real hair was already nothing but black residue. “I get it. I get it. It’s not your fault.”

Changshik heaved in a mouthful of air, stifling his sobs. He leaned back, keeping his head bowed. “Do you want to go back now?”

“I can stay until you feel better.”

Changshik shook his head, his bangs swaying at the motion, but still hiding his eyes. “You have to go back.” He released his hold on Jaejoong’s shirt and pushed the singer away.

Jaejoong withdrew his arms slowly, but as soon as his fingers brushed Changshik’s shoulders, the surface beneath his feet opened up and pulled him in. Jaejoong could barely let out a yelp as he fell back, the last thing he saw before being swallowed whole was Changshik’s hand reaching out to him.

=to be continued=

A/N: Phew! This chapter has been haunting me for 7 months and finally, it's over. If I go on, I'll babble, so I'll save anything I have to say in this chapter for my commentary later. I wanted to get this out quick because this part was supposed to be posted together with Part 1, but the chapter was getting too long and I couldn't finish this in time. I hope it makes more sense now.

All comments will be much loved and appreciated. After this depressing chapter, I've decided to make Chapter 10, um, slower and have fun with it. Please look forward to Chapter 10 (and its 3 Parts)!!

Thank you for supporting this fic. Have a nice day. *bows*

Disclaimer: This fic, although based on real people, is a pure work of fiction and does not reflect true occurrances, views and orientations. No financial profit has been made in the production of this fic. "Heroes" is created by Tim Kring.